A Racist or An A**hole?

If someone who is a white American male: 

(1) likes to mimic a black man with verbiage such as, "look at me I'm a cool , jive talking, black man". This is a 2nd hand story...but I swear I heard he said nigger...but since it's a second hand story, I'm going to give this jerk the benefit of the doubt.

(2) interrupts your conversation (one he wasn't involved in) with a swim instructor to make the comment, "so it is true, black people can't swim".

(3) is the so-called good friend of your husband, yet when he sees you at a party, ignores you for a good hour, then when he walks up he states, "oh I didn't see you because it's dark in here", as he laughs at his so-called joke.  BTW:  It wasn't dark (don't think club dark; think intimate party dark...lights were on in both the kitchen and the living room we were in), and I'm one of only 2 Black females there

Is this person a racist, a jackass, an insensitive immature frat boy, or a combination of all of them?

Here Leezard, Leezard, Leezard!!

OK...we have a lizard in the house.  It's not a big one but in any case this place is not big enough for the both of us.  For those who don't know my husband...he will NOT kill a fly.  Seriously.  So...when I saw the creature the first time, about a week ago, downstairs...I'm like, "oooh there's a lizard, get it" and Roland says, "oh, that's my friend" (Huh!!) and the creature ran under the door to where the water heater was located.  And, that was all good, as long as he/she/it stayed in there.  But, today I'm talking to my dad on the phone...I go upstairs ( I can't even remember now why I went up stairs, since I'm now traumatized), and this thing is on the wall, near my bed!!!!!!!  Roland isn't home...so I call him at his friends house to say, "Baby, the lizard is in our bedroom, you gotta come get it"; well he shows up 5 minutes later...and of course the thing is no where to be found.  I don't have a clue where it's at.  I had Roland turn everything in the room over...nada!!!!!!  Now, I don't want to sleep in the bed...I'm yawning.  And, yes...it seems silly...but I don't do pests.  Roland is upstairs sleeping soundly, and I'm downstairs yawning and paranoid the creature is going to crawl on my or something.  Eeeeeeeew.  Is there anyway to keep these creatures out of the house, and how do you get them out once they're in?  Really...I don't want to kill it...personally, I couldn't do it...but I want him outside where it belongs.

Discovered Bahrain - Thank Goodness

I've discovered Bahrain. WhooHoo!!   Bahrain is a small little island of a country that is attached via a causeway (long, low, over the water bridge, kinda like the florida keys).  Yea...I'm really feeling this spot.  Went there on Monday for lunch and drinks, even tagged the wall (as you can see).  For those who don't know...I represent the West side; Cali baby!!   (LOL).  I fell in the wet floor in the bathroom.  What is up with these people and the freakin wet floors!!!!?  That put my back out of whack for  a minute (3 days)...just in time for me to go back for a "Sunday Brunch" - which is actually on Friday's here.  Had a blast.  As you can see from the pictures.   Also...I think I've located the spot where I will get my hair braided.  I'm always leery of trying new people on my hair.  The person who does my braids in the states has been doing my hair for 7 years...now I have to have these strangers on my head...but...I'll get over it...especially when my hair starts to look raggedy.

It's Oh-Bah-Ma Bah-Ma!!

Finally The Day Has Come!!  It's Obama Bama!! WhooHoo!!

Want Edumacation? Islamic Calendar

So...Ms. Melanie...this one's for you.  

As I've stated before...my blog isn't about teaching people about Saudi Arabia; it's about me and my experiences in Saudi Arabia.  However, there is one blog in which the writer tends to have some interesting and informative posts about life in Saudi Arabia; just watch out for some of the people who comment as these people seem to take over her posts, sometimes even telling her to make changes!!  However, her post are typically good.  

Following is her post for the day titled:  Saudi Arabia Use of Islamic Dates - Confusion and Misunderstanding.

Confusion (i.e. complete lack of efficiency) and Misunderstanding are excellent words to describe a lot of what this place is about....and it's not just about the dates, it's just an example.  If the whole world uses one uniform calendar for business....

Latest YouTube Video

I posted a video on YouTube about 2 months ago titled "Why I'm Moving To Saudi Arabia". This was in response to friends and co-workers as to why I would move there. Well...the response was kinda overwhelming. I've received numerous emails from Arabs and Saudi's welcoming me to the country, and have had over 2500 people view the video. Since then...I've received quite a number of emails from people who viewed this video on YouTube asking, how I'm doing and when will my next video hit. So...this video is for those people. Enjoy!

Saudi Woman Begging 4 Money

Before I moved to Saudi Arabia, I read, read, and read.  I spoke with colleagues (westerners) who have lived here.  So despite what some think...I knew full well what I was getting into.  It's like when you go to Paris...you know the Parisians are some rude fucks.  But...you really under estimate the level they can take it to; they are connoisseurs at condescension, that's for sure. But, I'll be there twice this year.  LOL  Eff em...I can hang with the best.

One thing you will not read about Saudi Arabia is people begging.  Tonight as I left the bookstore, there was a lady, in full regalia (abaya, face completely covered)...seated on the ground, with her son, mumbling versus, with her hand out begging for money.  I saw a Saudi woman begging like a homeless person on the street of the states!! I couldn't believe it.  After my shock...I got out of the car and went back and gave her 100 riyals.  She never even acknowledged I gave it to her, she kept saying whatever it was she was saying.  This is horrible. I'm used to giving money to the homeless because, hell I'm fortunate.  I spend a money daily on stuff that is a luxury for some, so I don't mind.  However, to see it here...it just felt "not right". 

Inter-Racial Profiling

Well...it was bound to happen sooner or later.  Tonight while in Al-Khobar I was officially Muttawanized.  Yes...we were stopped by the Muttawa; aka the religious police; aka the The Commission For The Propogation of Virtue and Prevention of Vice; aka The Biggest C-Blockers Ever!!

I don't know why they stopped us...probably because we don't "match up".  I had to do everything in my power to keep my mouth shut...so I just glared...cursing him in my head, and Roland is looking at me and slowly shaking his head like...don't go there, don't go there.  Of course...I didn't go there...but I gave him the Stank Eye. 

The Good With The Bad

I have to acknowledge that today...I actually had a good day.  I was able to accomplish my errands with little interference.  I wasn't frustrated at being here, and I've met a few more cool people at a dinner party last night.   The energy is definitely with me today.  

So........I have to acknowledge when it's good, and be thankful for a good day.  Because as you know...if you've been reading my blog...I'm been complainy, whiny, bitchy, and any other acronym you can come up with to describe me communicating my displeasure.

T-Mobile, that corporate devil, is even unlocking my phone early so I can get my blackberry (yes, I love my blackberry) up and running with a local number.  

And...another one!!

Thanks Mom!!!  I got my care package today.  Why?  Because you care!!!  I agree, the large jersey would have been huge.

I'm so glad to get it that I will not even complain that the extra special guards at the gate wouldn't let the FedEx guy on the camp and that I had to drive up to the gate to pick the package up.  See...for every 2, they give you, they take 1 away.

Love Ya!!

So Far So Good

So...today is starting out pretty decent.  I got my air-shipment this morning. WhooHoo!!! In this shipment I had my MacPro, my editing suite, a new printer, more camera equipment, my Dyson, Food Processor, some clothes, and some more stuff.  But...the most important thing I've been waiting for was................the scale. Well................... Thanks to the "I'm in Saudi, and I'm not really feeling like eating anything here"; I've lost...............10 freakin pounds!!!!!  10 freakin' pounds. WhooHoo!!!!  I'm Lovin' That!!

That's the way to start the day.  Now...let me get out into the country (gotta go to the mall and run some errands) and see if they (the powers that be) can manage to kill my good start (there is a high probability of this...based on past experience).   Wish me luck, in getting one thing accomplished that is on my list for today. 

Later...

Equal Opportunity Racist

I love this saying, and I subscribe to it.  Once my mother told me, "I'm an equal opportunity racist...I hate everybody...that includes black folks".  

The reason I love this statement is because there is a lot of truth to it.  I've had blacks who don't like me because (1) my husband is white and (2) I hang with too many white folks; yet one of my longest and dearest friends (who I can count on at any time to keep it real) is Black.  I've been at work and I know (by the way I'm treated) this white MF just doesn't like my Black ass...yet whenever I've been given a promotion or someone stepped up to mentor me...it has always been a white person.  My best friend, who befriended me when I first moved to Seattle is white.

Being from California...we (Californians) all get irritated driving down the road (in California) at the Mexicans, because damn...can they get out of the way (do NOT do 60 in the fast lane!!)...and why are there 10 people in that car...yet, my 1st crush was on a Mexican Boy...and the best couple (a retired couple) who helped me with Henry when he was a baby, and treated him literally like he was their own, was a Mexican couple.  They didn't need to do this for the money...they did it because I needed someone close to home to watch over my son while I went to work.  God knows I could talk about the Asians, and how I feel you can never trust those sneaky bastards (they will smile and nod, even when they're hating you)...but then the 1st person to trust me when I went into the real estate business some years ago, was Asian (Korean), and one of my favorite clients (meaning they were easy to work with) was also Asian (Thai).

And, before I came here...I had some "stereo typical" ideas about Saudi's and who these people were.  Yet...every Saudi I have had to opportunity to speak with, I have enjoyed the conversation immensely, and they have truly been helpful (i.e the nice ladies in the mall).

So...I'm saying it...I'm an equal opportunity racist (most humans just get on my nerves; really just look at the state of the world)...with no allegiance to any group...and I enjoy the companionship and company of those who are just good people along the way; regardless of "so-called" race.

No Midol In The Kingdom

There is no Midol available in the KSA.  I went to the pharmacy, and asked for it (because of course I was cramping).  The guy didn't even know what it was...but when Roland told him what I was needing it for...the guy behind the counter gave me something else.  This something else (Solpadeine - which contains Codeine); was literally something else.  It knocked me out for 12 hours and I was groggy half of the next day!!!!  It's horrible.  I will never take this stuff again...unless of course, I break a leg.  So...this is just one more thing I will have to bring back with me when I come back from the States or Europe.  Ladies of Saudi Arabia: Midol is a Godsend when it comes to "that time of the month".  It focuses it's action on where it needs to be (meaning no more cramps), and no where else (this means you can still go about your day, without feeling sluggish or groggy).  I think that if men got cramps...Midol would be available in the KSA.

Have Uterus...Must Breed

Why is it that some women (way too many) can not grasp the concept when a woman states, "I don't want any children" or "I don't want to have any more children".   It's weird.  I'm freakin 44, with a 19 year old son!!  Why in the hell would I want to have another child (risking my health and my life) at this stage in my life?  I'm finally free to live for me, and for what I want to do.  When someone asked me this (Don't you and Roland want to have children?) again today, my response was, "no, because we have a life and don't want to be tied down with children", her response, "but  your children would be so cute", then I stated, "the thought of having to travel, and I do a lot of it, with a stroller, car seat, diaper bag, and a baby in tow is a complete turnoff", her response, but "Roland would make such a good father, I had my last one at 42".  Huh?  Did this person even hear me?  My husband doesn't want children (he has told me this directly, he reasons, the earth is already over populated) and I don't want another one.  This is a life choice people.  Now...I have to state this isn't something limited to me being in the KSA, but I do think it's cultural, since I've had this same question asked again and again by African women in the states.  One even told me...I'm suppose to have 5 more children.  I think she was joking, but half serious, since she had 5 kids ( i think) herself.  6 freakin kids!!!  Coming out of this Uterus?!!!  I don't think so.  

Puleese...I think some of these women just, "hate me for my freedom".  LOL.

Listen people, just because I have a Uterus, does not mean I must breed.

Feelin' Pretty Good Right Now

I'm feeling really good right now.  I went to the beauty salon on camp and met a wonderful Saudi lady.  We had excellent conversation...and I really did enjoy meeting her.  I don't know why I'm feeling so good...maybe it was because of the positive interaction...maybe it's because I got a much needed mani/pedi and eyebrow wax, maybe it was the good vibrations I picked up...but I feel like I have to acknowledge the good feelings along with the bad, especially since I've been so crabby lately.   

Gotta go...I'm hungry and this is a good time to go into town...as we've just consulted the prayer schedule.  People back home...I will explain the prayer schedule thing in a future post.  Believe me...you have to work around this schedule.

I'm Out!!

Other Black Females - Yippee

Not that I EVER thought I wouldn't see other Black American women here...I know that we're still in the minority, when they're hiring westerners.  And, please before you say it (people of non-color), we're not all the same...if the person is from Africa, we're not long lost sisters, and more than likely (at least in my experience) do not have much in common other than our shades of dark skin, and hair texture.

So, I'm really excited that I've met some other Black American females (Yippee)...and that's made me feel better as well.  Not only have I received a few referrals on where to get my hair done...they'll be able to relate to where I'm at, and where I'm coming from in regards to this transition and living in Saudi Arabia.  Not that I care...but I have noticed that the "white" westerners will not even look at me (they're pretty much unfriendly), let alone speak...not even to say excuse me (behavior I don't see much in the states); it's pretty weird since the majority of my friends in the states are "not Black" (check out previous posts with pics).  I wonder if they've come here and created their own little "exclusive" (wink, wink) club.

No Wonder....And, I'm Feeling Better

OK.  So I'm back...and feeling better.  And...no wonder I was so freakin emotional...I was PMSing. So...I'm not turning into a total weakling...my hormones were going crazy.   Just knowing that, makes me feel better.

Thank U!! It's a New Day

Thanks Everyone for your support.  I was having a breakdown day yesterday.  As most of you know, I'm making a documentary about my 1st year here.  So...last night, when I was in "breakdown mode" (this means I was crying); for those who don't know me, crying is like the last straw!!!  I would sooner get angry, cuss, and fuss; before I cry.  Crying to me...is weak...so when I get there, I'm actually angry that I got there.  Anyway...during this time...Roland got out "the" video recorder (I have a high-end, prosumer series, designed for movie making) and started recording.  And, for those who thought I would kill him during those moments...please know...he is still alive and well =) ...and I thank him for thinking to record it.  So...Thanks Again Baby!!  That makes for good footage.

Dad:  "Keep Your Eyes On The Prize".  Thanks for the words of encouragement and for reminding me why I'm here.  

Miss Betty:  "Don't let them steal Terri's JOY!!!"  Girl...thank you for reminding me that I'm a positive, and outgoing person.  It's hard to remember that when literally, this place is deliberately trying to steal your joy. Your positive words made me feel real good when I read them this morning.  Thanks Again!! 

Miss Kym:  "You better be fighting the depression - your way stronger than that.  Been exercising??  Shopping??" - Yes I Am!!!  And, No I haven't been exercising (ok...I kinda resent the female gym hours and male gym hours, but that's no excuse), and I haven't really been shopping.  I did go looking for some shoes only to discover that Saudi women apparently have small feet, as the largest shoe size most places had were a size 8, and my big foot is a size 10 (but hell, they should be, I'm 5ft8!!).  Which only served to frustrate me even more.  But...your words ring true (I am way stronger than that!!)...I could at least go for a daily walk, until my free weights show up.  Thank You for the kick in the "you know what". 

I'm going to take a break from posting to my blog over for a few days because my words are getting too depressing, and too angry.  Hopefully, I'll come back in a better mood.  And, everyone...Thanks Again and Again!!  Until then...Peace. 

The Biggest C-Block Ever

C-Block:  The act of preventing someone from doing what they want to do.   This term is typically used by guys who are trying to hook up...and someone is "blocking" this activity. Guys typically use this to describe the ugly girl...who is trying to prevent her cute friend from meeting a guy.  Or, the hater guy, who is trying to prevent his friend from hooking up.

I use this term for anyone or anything that is trying to prevent me from doing what I want to do.  For example...I was blocked from going to an Astrology site.  I was also prevented from downloading Firefox, a web browser!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Please DO NOT attempt to try to explain this mess to me, and why it's so.  I dont care.   I'd understand if it was porn. But...Astrology?!!!!  A Web Browser?!!!!!!!  I will NEVER accept anyone trying to have authority over me.  Ever.  I resent it. Even if I act like I'm going along, I hate it, and inside I'm cursing them.  Period. 

Today Was Better

Today was a lot better.  Now...if I spent most of the day in the house and sleeping; does that count?  LOL.  But...I'm being proactive in trying to get myself out of Act 2.  So...I've reached out to a few females I've met...and I'm arranging "play dates".  Also, I've reached out to the beauty salon on the compound and made an appointment to get a mani/pedi.  Now...how I could've gone this long (4 weeks since the last one) without getting a pedicure is beyond me...this would not have ever happened in the states (unless of course, I was snowed in).  Oh yea...and I'm getting an eyebrow wax.  Moving to a foreign destination is no excuse to let yourself go.  

So...I'm sitting waiting for Roland to come home.  Just the thought of waiting for "my husband to come home" sounds so...needy.  But...I'm hungry and he should be home shortly so I'm going to wait so we can eat together.  In the states...I would hardly wait...I'd go get something to eat, and he'd have to "work it out" himself.  I would pick up something if I knew he needed it...but my husband's eating habits are out of this world.  He's a Raw Food Vegan (google it if you want more information).   I know some think it's the woman's responsibility when it comes to the "food and stuff".  But hell...my thoughts were I'm dealing with work 60 hours a week...don't look to me...hell I need a wife.  LOL.   Well...he just walk through the door...and guess what...he came with provisions.  Gotta love that.  I'm out.  Later...

Ms. Independent is having Just One Of Those Days

So...I've discovered a new tool.  =)  And, I had to add a few more songs that I feel describe me today:

Get Your Own Free Hypster.com Playlist.

What Love Is...It's Why I'm Staying

Just one of those days.  Yes...I'm pissy again.  I'm missing so many things.  And, if you list them one by one...they're not that big a deal...but when you add it up....it's a lot...it's frustrating as hell... and I feel like my husband just doesn't get it.  So...then that makes me even more irritated.  Yea, Yea, Yea, I know...I'm only 1 week in...And, I'm in Act 2 to Culture Shock.

In one of my videos I mentioned the only reason we were coming here is for the money...which is true...but the only reason I'm here (because I had a choice to stay in the states) is because I love my husband and I'm trying to be supportive.  HOWEVER, he seems to have no understanding whatsoever of how I'm feeling and my frustration.  For example, I've been here a week...and I've been unable to go anywhere without him (there is a thing as too much togetherness) because I didn't have my Camp ID card (which I got today, thank goodness); then on the way home from IKEA today I realized, I miss my effing car!!!! ...with it's slamming sound system, and singing as I drive down the road.  I'm in some freaking rental (we can't purchase a car until his probation period is up), that has a cassette player!!!  Huh!!?  What!!? Do they even still make cassettes?  Gawd!  It's the little things.  And, God knows, I miss the efficiency of getting things done.  If you want to do something the most complicated way possible...there is something to be said for efficiency.  As I'm listening to my IPod and a song by Mary J. Blige came on "What Love Is"...and it summed up the situation perfectly, in regards to love and why I'm staying.   

Get Your Own Free Hypster.com Playlist.

Whew...I feel better already...I really had to dump.

Driving in Saudi Arabia

On our drive up to Ras Tanura...I witnessed 1st hand how crazy they drive here.  But...I wasn't afraid...I wanted to drive!!!   It was like a wild ride, and I feel like I can show em a thing or 3.

LOL.  I mean really, I can haul a** with the best of them; driving on the shoulder to pass...I love it.  I want to do it.  I'm trying to scheme up a way to look like a man so I too can haul a** up the freeway.  I can easily hang at 140 - 150 km/hr.  In my younger years when I was driving a sports car...I used to race it regularly, and I would get it up to 130 mph (200 km/hr); no problem.   I wanna drive fast.  :(

Doing Better Today - We Got Housing!!

OK.  Today I'm smiling and doing a whole lot better than yesterday.

We got our housing assignment about 2 days ago...but I hadn't seen the place.  The deal is...you get, what you get assigned when it comes to the housing.  But...check it out...I'm totally loving where they've put us.  It's right across the street from the beach.  YES!!  3 bedrooms; 3 bathrooms, nice size kitchen, living room, dining room, front patio and larger back patio.  I have a balcony off the master bedroom, which is huge (big enough for a king size bed and a sitting area); and there's a huge walk in closet (which of course is mine, Roland will have to park his clothes elsewhere :)  ).  I'm 1/2 block from the walking trail that runs along the beach...perfect for rollerblading.  I'm really excited to get in and get settled.  All of the appliances are new, they even put food (apples, oranges, water, juice, cookies, coffee) in the refrigerator for us.  Right now, we're living in Dhahran, however, our housing is located in Ras Tanura; which is about 40 minutes away...but I don't care.  I think I'm really going to like the smaller community.  With one exception...outside of the camp...there is literally nothing worth seeing...so I see myself going into Al-Khobar at least once a week.   So...we're going to move it towards the end of the month.  I can hardly wait to start decorating.  Yea!!!!!!!!

$5 Fill Up

In my irritation...I forgot to mention that today we filled up the car we're renting.  It was on "E" "E"...this means riding on fumes...we filled up for $5.00!!!

That was the bright spot of my day!

Not A Good Day!!

Hey Kym!!  Girl...this is a special shout out to you since you stated I needed to have more postings.  =)

Right now...my mood can best be described as crappy.  I'm irritable (and you know I'm a straight up "B" when I'm irritated)...I wanna talk to my mom, when I want to talk to her (it's too early there). You know I'm used to talking to Shirley 3 - 4 times a day.  I miss my television shows.  I miss my usual food.   I just want to crawl into bed and pull the covers over my head. Good thing I like to read....so I'm going to grab my book...a few magazines...and go be by myself before I bite Roland's head off, spit it out on the ground...then stomp on it. No...he hasn't done anything...but he's in close proximity.  LOL.  Gawd!!!  I need an attitude adjustment...but as it's said, "this too shall pass".  I've been here 4 days and counting.

Stay well...hug Rocky...kick Grizz (smile)...and I'll have a more positive and informative post tomorrow.

T